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Kim-Ghera
26 Jul 2019

  • Arabisch
  • Französisch (Frankreich) Fast fließend
  • Englisch (US)
  • Englisch (UK)
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Frage über Englisch (US)

For native speakers.
Please guys help me with this, it's long but I need it so badly, I'm participating in a competition with this. Thank you in advanced.
My name is Hakim Ghera, I'm 32 years old  from Algeria, I'm a volunteer private English tutor. I grew up in a country where English is barely used  and heard. living in a community bouncing back and forth between Arabic and French didn't prevent me from  learning and teaching English since  2011. I nearly hit the native speaker level with a North American accent.    
I've been teaching face to face and online, with the least materials that any teacher would ever  get. Teaching english abroad  has always been my lifelong dream job. people consider teaching a second language abroad as a good chance to get a visa  and paycheck, whereas I see it as a  glorious opportunity that not only would it get me out of my small town, but also it will affect every aspect of my life.                        
I've always dreamed about living and teaching in the southeast Asia,  in a country where I would be able to develop myself and carrier. also this part of the world has a lot to offer in terms of culture and lifestyle, which made it a special environment to set goals and objectives, other than improving my financial  status.                      for myself I prefer to work with teenager students, because  this is the critical stage of life to acquire a new language perfectly. on the other hand, even though this market is not easy to joing in, especially with thousands of experienced native teachers, I believe with hard work and patience it wouldn't not be impossible to become an international  non-native  English teacher.                                             Finally, with your help and advice I wish  all of these goals will be achieved one day and all of my dreams will come true

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deadIy
26 Jul 2019

  • Englisch (US)
“My name is Hakim Ghera, I'm 32 years old and from Algeria. I do volunteer work as a private English tutor. I grew up in a country where English was barely used and rarely heard. Although I lived in a community that constantly bounced back and forth between Arabic and French, it didn't prevent me from learning and teaching English, which I’ve been doing since 2011. I nearly hit the native speaker level once I achieved a North American accent.      I've been teaching online with very little materials. Teaching english abroad has always been my lifelong dream job. People often consider teaching a second language abroad as a good chance to get a visa and paycheck, whereas I see it as a  glorious opportunity that not only would get me out of my small town, but also would affect every aspect of my life.                         I've always dreamed about living and teaching in Southeast Asia or in a country where I would be able to develop myself and my character. I believe this part of the world has a lot to offer in terms of culture and lifestyle, which makes it a special environment to set different goals and objectives, besides improving my financial status.                      Personally, I prefer to work with teenagers, because it is the critical stage of life to acquire a new language perfectly.  On the other hand, even though this market is not easy to join in to, (especially with thousands of experienced native teachers), I believe with hard work and patience it wouldn't be impossible to become an international and non-native English teacher. Finally, with your help and advice, I hope that all of these goals will be able to be achieved one day, and that all of my dreams will come true.” Good luck with your interview!

“My name is Hakim Ghera, I'm 32 years old and from Algeria. I do volunteer work as a private English tutor. I grew up in a country where English was barely used and rarely heard. Although I lived in a community that constantly bounced back and forth between Arabic and French, it didn't prevent me from learning and teaching English, which I’ve been doing since 2011. I nearly hit the native speaker level once I achieved a North American accent. 
   
I've been teaching online with very little materials. Teaching english abroad has always been my lifelong dream job. People often consider teaching a second language abroad as a good chance to get a visa and paycheck, whereas I see it as a  glorious opportunity that not only would get me out of my small town, but also would affect every aspect of my life.
                       
I've always dreamed about living and teaching in Southeast Asia or in a country where I would be able to develop myself and my character. I believe this part of the world has a lot to offer in terms of culture and lifestyle, which makes it a special environment to set different goals and objectives, besides improving my financial status.                      Personally, I prefer to work with teenagers, because it is the critical stage of life to acquire a new language perfectly. 

On the other hand, even though this market is not easy to join in to, (especially with thousands of experienced native teachers), I believe with hard work and patience it wouldn't be impossible to become an international and non-native English teacher.

Finally, with your help and advice, I hope that all of these goals will be able to be achieved one day, and that all of my dreams will come true.”

Good luck with your interview!

soyeonprint
26 Jul 2019

  • Englisch (US)
  • Französisch (Kanada) Fast fließend

Few things.

First, make sure you go through this text and correct your capitalization. Every sentence must start with a capital letter.

"English is barely used and heard" is fine, but "used or heard" sounds more native.

"that not only would it get me out of my small town" sounds slightly unnatural. Remove the word "it" from that.

"but also it will affect every aspect" again slightly unnatural. Remove the word "it". You also use "would" and "will" in the same sentence, which is changing tenses.

"People consider teaching a second language abroad as a good chance to get a visa and paycheck, whereas I see it as a glorious opportunity that not only would get me out of my small town, but also would affect every aspect of my life."

"the southeast Asia" should just be "south-east Asia". No need for "the".

You mean "career", not "carrier".

"which made it a special environment" switches tenses again. Use "makes" instead of "made" to keep it consistent.

"teenager students" sounds unnatural. "teenage students" is better.

You typo'd "joing" instead of "join" (don't worry it happens to everyone).

"it wouldn't not be impossible" is called a double-negative and its a common error that even some native speakers make. This should be "it would not be impossible".

Finally, good luck with your dream job!

Kim-Ghera
26 Jul 2019

  • Arabisch
  • Französisch (Frankreich) Fast fließend
@soyeonprint my version sounds terrible, I still have a lot to do😔, anyway, thank you so much I really appreciate it.
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Kim-Ghera
26 Jul 2019

  • Arabisch
  • Französisch (Frankreich) Fast fließend
@deadIy thank you so much I really appreciate it, I need to improve myself more and more.
student129
26 Jul 2019

  • Englisch (US)
@izanagui4 Hello! You’ve written very well. There are just minor mistakes here and there! I mostly altered some words to make the language more formal, but sometimes I just moved sentences to where they would better fit. I just want to give you a tip: when you write formally/professionally, it is advised to avoid the use of contractions; you should use the full words instead. Also, just in case this is a written work to be submitted, I have put spaces between to show where the paragraphs should be. Paragraphs, in general, should flow together and every sentence should stick to the main topic of the paragraph. Make sure to indent the first line of every paragraph if it is a written work. Best of luck! ☺️: My name is Hakim Ghera and I am 32-years-old. I am from Algeria and I volunteer as a private English tutor. As of late and because of my genuine love for what I do, I have been teaching both in person and online with far less materials than the standard teacher would have access to. I grew up in a country where English was barely used or heard. Instead, people continuously alternated between speaking Arabic and French. Although these were my circumstances, I never let them discourage me from learning or teaching English. I started in 2011 and I am now almost as proficient as a native speaker. I have also nearly perfected a native accent, which I view as an indispensable part of mastering any language.   Teaching English abroad has always been my lifelong dream. Some may view teaching a second language abroad as a chance to get a visa and paycheck, but I see it as a glorious opportunity. I have always dreamed about living and teaching in Southeast Asia, a country where I would be able to develop myself and career. Southeast Asia has unlimited potential to benefit me culturally and positively impact my lifestyle. (***you may want to add a sentence to describe exactly how it would benefit you to be more specific***)This makes it a special environment for me to set goals and objectives, rather than a place to live solely to improve my financial status.    Concerning my professional preferences, I prefer to work with teenage students. I value teenagers, in particular, because they are at the critical stage in their lives to acquire a new language perfectly.  I acknowledge that international teaching is a challenging career field to enter. This is further complicated by the fact that there are thousands of experienced native teachers, but I believe that with hard work and patience, becoming an international, non-native, English-speaking teacher is possible. With your help and advice, I believe that all of my goals can be achieved and that my dreams will come true.

@izanagui4 Hello! You’ve written very well. There are just minor mistakes here and there! I mostly altered some words to make the language more formal, but sometimes I just moved sentences to where they would better fit. I just want to give you a tip: when you write formally/professionally, it is advised to avoid the use of contractions; you should use the full words instead.

Also, just in case this is a written work to be submitted, I have put spaces between to show where the paragraphs should be. Paragraphs, in general, should flow together and every sentence should stick to the main topic of the paragraph. Make sure to indent the first line of every paragraph if it is a written work. Best of luck! ☺️:

My name is Hakim Ghera and I am 32-years-old. I am from Algeria and I volunteer as a private English tutor. As of late and because of my genuine love for what I do, I have been teaching both in person and online with far less materials than the standard teacher would have access to.

I grew up in a country where English was barely used or heard. Instead, people continuously alternated between speaking Arabic and French. Although these were my circumstances, I never let them discourage me from learning or teaching English. I started in 2011 and I am now almost as proficient as a native speaker. I have also nearly perfected a native accent, which I view as an indispensable part of mastering any language.
 

Teaching English abroad has always been my lifelong dream. Some may view teaching a second language abroad as a chance to get a visa and paycheck, but I see it as a glorious opportunity. I have always dreamed about living and teaching in Southeast Asia, a country where I would be able to develop myself and career. Southeast Asia has unlimited potential to benefit me culturally and positively impact my lifestyle. (***you may want to add a sentence to describe exactly how it would benefit you to be more specific***)This makes it a special environment for me to set goals and objectives, rather than a place to live solely to improve my financial status.   

Concerning my professional preferences, I prefer to work with teenage students. I value teenagers, in particular, because they are at the critical stage in their lives to acquire a new language perfectly. 

I acknowledge that international teaching is a challenging career field to enter. This is further complicated by the fact that there are thousands of experienced native teachers, but I believe that with hard work and patience, becoming an international, non-native, English-speaking teacher is possible. With your help and advice, I believe that all of my goals can be achieved and that my dreams will come true.

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For native speakers. Please guys help me with this, it's long but I need it so badly, I'm participating in a competition with this. Thank you in advanced. My name is Hakim Ghera, I'm 32 years old  from Algeria, I'm a volunteer private English tutor. I grew up in a country where English is barely used  and heard. living in a community bouncing back and forth between Arabic and French didn't prevent me from  learning and teaching English since  2011. I nearly hit the native speaker level with a North American accent.     I've been teaching face to face and online, with the least materials that any teacher would ever  get. Teaching english abroad  has always been my lifelong dream job. people consider teaching a second language abroad as a good chance to get a visa  and paycheck, whereas I see it as a  glorious opportunity that not only would it get me out of my small town, but also it will affect every aspect of my life.                         I've always dreamed about living and teaching in the southeast Asia,  in a country where I would be able to develop myself and carrier. also this part of the world has a lot to offer in terms of culture and lifestyle, which made it a special environment to set goals and objectives, other than improving my financial  status.                      for myself I prefer to work with teenager students, because  this is the critical stage of life to acquire a new language perfectly. on the other hand, even though this market is not easy to joing in, especially with thousands of experienced native teachers, I believe with hard work and patience it wouldn't not be impossible to become an international  non-native  English teacher.                                             Finally, with your help and advice I wish  all of these goals will be achieved one day and all of my dreams will come true
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